A sample scene we have put together and will reflect on in class. We only had the resources to use one character, hence it will just be a rough outline of the idea. Not our final idea.
Grade C Some good elements, but you need to look much closer at how such scenes are edited for your preferred reading to succeed. Good initial panning, Trick or Treat style (tho' external ES [ELS] more conventional to open with) + some effort with mise-en-scene 2 idents in (1 missing), both work nicely Good pan to include couple pic Careful with the diegetic sound - its cut when you add the sound effect as the phone starts (a mistake); we plainly see him pausing the game long after this Jump cuts have to be carefully handled - here it just looks like clumsy editing. As ever, you need to examine actual examples to see what additional media language they used to pull off jump cuts/ellipsis (which can be effective) Is our protag meant to be HURRYING out?! Good acting (directing?) for brief phone call bit, bu then its strangely slow + unhurried. More shot variety needed for this to work too. The GLIMPSE of killer is an ok idea - but must be a GLIMPSE; much too long a take here (and try other FX!). Car mirror is a good idea - but the editing of the scene renders its meaningless, as there's such a long gap between the 'glimpse' and this action
Grade C
ReplyDeleteSome good elements, but you need to look much closer at how such scenes are edited for your preferred reading to succeed.
Good initial panning, Trick or Treat style (tho' external ES [ELS] more conventional to open with) + some effort with mise-en-scene
2 idents in (1 missing), both work nicely
Good pan to include couple pic
Careful with the diegetic sound - its cut when you add the sound effect as the phone starts (a mistake); we plainly see him
pausing the game long after this
Jump cuts have to be carefully handled - here it just looks like clumsy editing. As ever, you need to examine actual examples to see what additional media language they used to pull off jump cuts/ellipsis (which can be effective)
Is our protag meant to be HURRYING out?! Good acting (directing?) for brief phone call bit, bu then its strangely slow + unhurried. More shot variety needed for this to work too.
The GLIMPSE of killer is an ok idea - but must be a GLIMPSE; much too long a take here (and try other FX!). Car mirror is a good idea - but the editing of the scene renders its meaningless, as there's such a long gap between the 'glimpse' and this action